I have feelings for you I don’t truly understand
All I know I’d love to be able to hold your hand
When my gaze meets your eyes, my hearts all a flutter
Then I say something stupid and you think I’m a nutter
Looking back, this is a special piece. Out of all the pieces of valentines themed micro poetry I wrote in 2016, this one was actually aimed at someone in particular. Someone who I had fallen for in a really bad way. A fair bit of my my poetry has been inspired by that muse. Some of my most tragic romantic pieces as well as a few of the most hopefully poetry I’ve written since starting this blog.
It’s a nice piece, very sweet and describes my awkwardness quite well. The only issue I have re-reading this is that despite all the hopes and dreams I only ever got hurt in my pursuit of this girl. No regrets and completely all my own fault, but looking back it reminds me that I went a little stupid for a while.
I still think it’s special.
I even handmade this Valentine heart with the poem written on it. When I showed her, she wasn’t interested, but I really like the heart so I kept it and it now lives as part of my Valentines collection.
I feel bad that the romantics of this piece and the little bit of arts and crafts energy have been ignored. It may not have been wanted by the person it was intended for but I really enjoy it and it reminds me that heart racing thrill of being so head over heels for someone. I figure giving it a little spotlight this year might be nice. Plus there’s the vanity of showing off the heart itself, which I had a lot of fun making
For anyone that’s sat asking the question “what about the girl?” I honestly don’t know. I let the dreams of being with her go last shortly after this and decided that having that person in my life was more important that losing them because they don’t feel the same. So friends we were, till we weren’t. A few too many ignored text messages told me that she wasn’t even that keen on my friendship. I’ve not heard from her since November and whilst I’d love to check in and say hello, I’m smart enough to know that’s not what she wants. Regardless the love I had and still have in my heart for her won’t ever change. This piece is testament to that. Some people come into your life and make it better but don’t stick around. I figured out a while ago that we would never be more than people who worked together for a brief period, but I still miss her. I really hope she’s doing well and she’s happy. She deserves to be happy.
Luckily for me she doesn’t know that my blog exists and if she did she certainly doesn’t read it, so she gets to avoid the awkward pining of an old man who really should know better
I hope you lovely readers liked the poem, although if I’m honest, I hope you liked the heart more because I’m actually really proud of it. My artistic talent is pretty poor but I adore that heart.
Cameron D Hamilton 14/02/2017