Ross Noble – Brain Dump – 04/11/16

Ross Noble is an English comedian with a subversive and nonsensical brand of performance.  His shows are relatively unstructured as Ross has a comedic gift for playing to audience interaction he started and anyone brave enough to heckle.  Try and leave to go to the restroom and he’ll spend the entire time you’re away on a fantastical tangent about you that’ll make you curse you’re small bladder.  It’s no wonder I’m a huge fan.


I started going to see his shows in 2005 after seeing him appear on panel shows and his appearance on the BBC TV series ‘Live at the Apollo’.  Since then I’ve been to a show for each of the following UK tours he’s done.  His style of comedy has influenced my own sense of humour and had a big part to do with my own acceptance of my eccentric nonsensical traits.  He’s been a massive influence in my life over the past ten years and last night was show number seven for me!


Each show I go to always seems to have a nice personal twist for me by the time the night is over.  It could simple be due to the fact that I don’t go to shows very often, but every time I go to a Ross Noble show there’s always an unrelated story to tell.  That however will be saved for another day and a much larger post.


Today I just wanted to share some memories about the madness of the jokes told.  It might give you lovely readers an insight into my sense of humour and might even make you want to become a fan of Ross yourself.



People complain about airbrushing too much and they want it stopped.  It shouldn’t be stopped, instead they should go the opposite way.  Wouldn’t it be amazing to open up a glossy magazine and see a picture of Kim Kardashian with four boobs and two tails?



Q – I have a problem with slugs in my garden, I’ve tried pellets and other methods to rid myself of them but nothing has worked.  Do you have any suggestions?


A – Have you tried jerking off a Hippopotamus?


NHS (National Health Service)

Long waiting times have been blamed on immigrants clogging up the waiting rooms.  Once BREXIT comes into full effect and the immigrants are gone, the UK will need someone new to blame.  How about the clumsy?

If its an emergency you’re fine, but 50% of accidence are just people being clumsy.

I was hit by a car, the driver was on her phone.  That’s fine come right in

I fell off a roof fixing the satellite dish.  Fuck off back to Belgium!

Even better is everyone has to take a clumsyness test to see if theyre eligible for treatment.  Nothing too difficult.  Just a door that has the word ‘PUSH to open’ clearly visable.  Anyone who tired to pull the door… Fuck off back to Belgium!


I havnt done the joke justice here but they were my favourites from the night and the performance of them was literally breathtakingly funny, I actually had trouble breathing at one point.  Saying that, it’s not the first time he’s managed that with me.


If you’re interested check out Ross’s YouTube channel therossnoblechannel and hopefully this post might have introduced you to the sort of comic genius you never knew existed.




4 thoughts on “Ross Noble – Brain Dump – 04/11/16

        1. it’s not that hard he is certainly ly worth of it. I watched 5 dvds which probably had about 13 shows across them while I had thr house to myself.
          I think I might watch some more over Christmas. Just a shame he doesn’t have a new one out yet.

          Liked by 1 person

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