Am I Too Old?

In youth I choose to study the Arts

With no real prospects, just passion and smarts.
Yet today I use nothing I learned back then,
No regrets, but I wonder about studying again.

 

What interests me now has no real career guarantees,
I want more opportunities, not another wasted degree.
I’ve no more time to waste, or to act like a fool.
Am I too old to go back to school?

 

I currently have a job that I’ve come to truly hate,
With each passing moment it gets harder to tolerate.
I need something challenging, a true test of my skills,
I want this right now, before my life spirals downhill.

 

The job market’s terrible, or maybe that’s just for me,
Minimum wage and no benefits as a lowly trainee.
Security, respect and enjoyment are worryingly unclear.
Am I too old to start a new career?

 

To this very day I still live with my parents,
Living the same irresponsible way I did as a student.
I’ve never had the money to afford to move away,
A fact that embarrasses me, even if my parents say it’s okay.

 

I’ve never had the personality to successfully flat share
and the expense to live alone is ridiculously unfair
So I sit in a cramped bedroom, developing mental syndromes.
Am I too old to still be living at home?

 

My romantic life would make the ‘hardest’ of men weep,
I’m getting the real impression women think I’m a creep.
Putting myself out there and wearing my heart on my sleeve,
All ending tragically with emotions battered and cleaved.

 

Falling for someone is easy, but they never reciprocate,
I know I have so much to offer, yet ‘single’ seems to be my fate.
Never knowing if I lack looks, charm or witty repartee.
Am I too old to find someone who’ll love me?

 

Cameron D Hamilton 01/05/2016

Source: Am I Too Old?

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21 thoughts on “Am I Too Old?

  1. I believe we think we should be a certain way by a certain age, and if we dont fit into the mold somehow we believe ourselves as less than…but age is just a small measure in which we dissect into categories, when in truth age doesn’t define us rather if we are curators of love or oppressionists of evil…

    we are a world in deficit of giving… Give time, give patience, give love, give your yourself small gasps of breath in between. Seek goodness in everything you do, and drown in your passions as often as possible… And share yourself, be unafraid, life happens and whether we want or not change comes…go live tather than wait for it to come find you (you’ll wait long time) be open to the art of that which we call life… And your

    Liked by 1 person

    1. This is exactly what I need to read. Today marks a big adventure as I’m sat in the departure area awaiting a flight out to los angeles for thr start of a month long American adventure. It really inspires me with confidence to read your words and feel a little sense of calm. Thank you!!!

      I do agree, there’s a societal norm that surrounds a number and it does make things confused when you belive you haven’t met the norms. This piece was written a while back at a time when I was very confused about where I was going. It’s fitting to be reblogged this week as I take strides to be brave and take a few risks in life.

      Liked by 1 person

          1. No worries dear one… Just marvel at the diversity of LA and its surrounding cities… Take deep breaths when you feel overwhelmed and if you need help my 19 year old son is only an hour away by car! Teehee! Im sure i could convince him to show you a few places ! 😊😉😎

            Liked by 1 person

            1. Overwhelming is the right word, its a culture shock and it doesnt help i’m worn out from travel. tomorrow will be much better, once i get my bearings. I wanted to go out for dinner tonight but i can see me asleep before nine local time. The tour desk and hotel tourist services closed at 6pm and thats when my flight got in so i’ll sleep tonight, catch them in the morning and i’ll feel so much better and so much more in control.
              I certainly wouldn’t say no to a friend. I’ve got no set itinerary, maybe not the cleverest idea for me but i wanted the freedom. I have 3 baseball games i want to go to and a show. Got 2 of the games booked and the show so i just have to fill the days in between. Oh and get a US sim card for mobile internet so i can use maps cause i know i’m getting lost! Ahahahaha!!!
              The one thing i really need to do is remember to take photos. I’m jaw dropped in awe flying over the desert and on the taxi ride to the hotel the sun was setting one the way from LAX to downtown LA. Just gotta embrace being the tourist and take photos…i just have to accept people are going to state at me anyway, I will be wearing fedoras all the time.

              Liked by 1 person

              1. Yes sleep is necessary! Im excited for you…let me know if you feel the need for friend… My son just last weekend was exploring LA area… He wanted to see Santa Monica pier (he hasn’t yet)but found a great ramen restaurant near by…let me know if you want a friendly face wouldn’t take much to arrange… He’s working but not everyday! 😉

                Rest well! LA awaits you

                Liked by 1 person

                    1. Oh I will do. it’s a stunningly gorgeous day. I had to buy myself a hat and tshirt in order to fit in. I’m an angels fan as well but this is an amazing game. it’s vin scullys last game the dodgers are about to clinch the NL west. OMG the national anthem really gets to you and I’m a proud Scotsman.
                      Oh I’m going to embrace everything now I’ve properly slept!

                      Liked by 1 person

  2. I hope you don’t find it weird if I offer you a virtual hug. This really got to me because I’ve lived that life and I get why you would feel a certain kind of shame about it. Nevertheless, you should be true to yourself, and it sounds like you have been… even though circumstances haven’t shifted to accommodate and reflect this.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I don’t find it weird at all. It’s a personal commentary but also a social one. These days alot of people are plagued by not meeting the arbitrary standards society sets. It’s not a fun subject to dwell on but I like the poem a lot and felt it needed reblogging!

      Liked by 1 person

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