That Special One

 

 

I remember your face and your wonderful smile

I know it’s my fault we’ve not spoke in a while

I can still hear your voice in conversations we’ve shared

I just wish we still spoke and you knew I still cared

 

 

I don’t know what you’re doing or the adventures you’ve had

Longing to be part of them, but if I call, will you be mad?

It’s true I ruined everything when I fell hopelessly for you

Friendship changed, but hardly over, I’m still the same person you knew

 

 

The way you think inspires me, you’re my life coach and my muse

Now you can’t bare the sight of me, my ego badly bruised

You make me feel unworthy of simply being alive

Without you I feel empty, I’ve no idea how to survive

 

 

I’m aware it’s not your problem; I know you’ve made your choice

You cut me out because I cared and gave those feelings voice

I don’t regret the choice I made I took a chance and failed

It wasn’t my intent to hurt you or for our friendship to be derailed

 

 

If we get to speak again, I’m not sure what I’d say

Would you even listen, or tell me to go away

I wouldn’t blame you if you did; I’ve been an awful friend

But I’m not ready to let you go, don’t let this be the end

 

 

I think about you every day, I doubt you do the same

Lamenting every misguided decision as our friendship went down in flames

If I could do it all again, I’d still open my heart to you

There’s never been a more special one and that my dear is true

 

 

 

Cameron D Hamilton 02/06/2016


 

The preceding poem was written at the height of romantic confusion towards a truly amazing girl.  At the time of writing she become very distant with me and out friendship appeared to be falling apart, mostly due to my unrequited affections.  Never published at the time and never sent, this poem is an example of pleading heartache.  I’ve chosen to publish this poem today (14/08/16) as I reach a crossroads in my general life, not just romantically, and even though my love for this girl is pure and everlasting, she and I will never be together.  This love letter in all its longing angst needed to be put into the world as a sign to myself that I’m ready to move forward, but she’ll always be special to me.

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22 thoughts on “That Special One

    1. Awww, thank you!
      Its a subject that no matter how much distance I have I always find my way back to the heartache of it all.
      It was strange to record this month’s later especially as those words were still as true as they were back then
      I’m really glad you enjoyed it 😊

      Liked by 1 person

      1. rakhioverhere

        Yes. It’s actually difficult to get over someone. And more ugly when you see that person going out with someone else. More horrible is when they post their close, intimate photos on Facebook. And we can do nothing but keep watching it.

        Liked by 1 person

  1. Pingback: Goodbye – Cameron D Hamilton

  2. “If I could do it all again, I’d still open my heart to you
    There’s never been a more special one and that my dear is true”

    Some mistakes are worth making over and over again, just to feel that once in a lifetime love. The more I know you, the more I see just how unfair it is that your open heart would be rejected. With so very few people in the world willing to care, your romantic and compassionate heart is a treasure. I’m glad you’re trying to discover that.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I think through all the confused thought in this piece those last lines pull it into a coherent light. She’s special and will remain so and no matter what’s happened, I’ll never regret a single moment on the unrequited feelings I’ve had.

      Just need to find someone who likes romance, you’d think it would be easier, I was always taught girls love romance 😄

      Liked by 1 person

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