Why have I amassed a collection of bubble wrap?
I never post packages, it’s basically just scrap
I heard it can be useful, when it comes to stress relief
Maybe it’ll come in handy, if I need a quick release
Why do I have a box, crammed full of colourful ribbons?
I’m pretty sure the stereotype, is that they’re meant for women
Although I’ve cultivated a fashion style that’s already quite out there
Maybe I could wear them, tied through my pretty dark brown hair
Why are there empty boxes scattered everywhere I look
I swear they must be breading in every corner, every crook
There’s far too much junk in here, littered all over the place
Maybe I could use the boxes as handy storage space
Why do I have a massive pile, of out of date magazines
Some of them go way back, to when I was in my teens
I’ve had this new idea on how to show off poetic quotes
Maybe I could use them, to do the style of ransom notes
Why do I have a coffee mug that’s filled with paper clips?
Did I keep them after hearing all those internet life hack tricks?
The government’s latest boondoggle, has really opened a Pandora’s Box
Maybe if the country goes to hell, I could use them for picking locks
Why have I kept all the tags, whenever I buy new clothes?
Sure some of the designs are pretty. If I’m honest, I suppose
I’ve been keeping them all in a folder but for what, that isn’t clear
Maybe I could make a collage, that’d be a rather creative idea
Why have I got all these pint glasses living in my bedroom?
They’d be more at home in the kitchen, wouldn’t you assume
I think they’ve all been stolen, from various pubs and clubs
Maybe I could display then, they might class my bedroom up
Why do I continue, to hoard so much random stuff?
You’d think by now, that I would have, collected quite enough
I always dream up reasons, to hold on to all the clutter
I think that proves once more, that I’m quite the eccentric nutter!