As the day crawls leisurely to another sunlit end
I sit in silence, slowly going round the bend
After everyone’s left I wonder why I’m still here
Their well wishes and goodbyes, so very insincere
Abandoned, betrayed and tortured inside
My eyes tell a truth, my words graciously hide
Alone and afraid of being left with my thoughts
Desperate for distractions, though reliefs a long shot.
All of my anger burns close to the surface
Sun setting, rage rising, “what’s my actually purpose?”
If I get up, if I leave, would anyone notice?
Or does that play into, my unending psychosis.
I don’t understand, why I’ve tied myself to this place
It’s not like I contribute anything to the human race
It’s probably not healthy, to be wallowing in despair
But who said being alone, would turn out to be fair
I find myself blocked, taunted under a glass ceiling
Watching people pass by, toying with my feelings
Jealous those around me, are able to escape
Contemplating my life, my dreams and my fate.
I stare into the void on my computer screen
The content never changes, neither does my routine
A reminder that I may have seen all I’ll ever see
A question emerges, “what’s next for me?”
If the truth is to be told, I’ve no happiness left
My life at large, has me feeling bereft
I think I may leave, there’s really nothing to fear
Unless I find the answer, to “why am I here?”