Printer

It would seem my work stations being used as storage
Random items appearing without consent or knowledge
It really shows how much the office respects me
Especially considering their ignoring my pleas

 

In front of me there sits, a large unused printer
Unplugged and unloved, not turned on since the winter
I’ve really no idea why it’s been sat down there
but it’s blocking a pretty view, which I find quite unfair

 

I’ve grown to hate the printer and its unresponsive stare
A foreboding hunk of plastic that draws daggers as I glare
Its gloomy grey colour drains all the wonder from my day
My happiness is in jeopardy, its welcome is overstayed

 

I can take the disrespect, from the clutter that’s been left
It’s the blinding of my sight, that’s making me bereft
As you might have guessed, there a pretty girl involved
The printers stole a vision that once had me enthralled

 

In anger I cry vengeance, upon my ink filled foe
Its time it found a new home, let’s start with out the window
The logistics of my plan really aren’t very clear
But if I can make one promise, it’ll soon be out of here

 

I’m not considered wild to act, but my passion will see me through
It’s not like it can stop me, there’s no chance of a rescue
Moving it away unseen, will take a rather elaborate plot
It’s just a shame I didn’t give it, a little more forethought

 

One thing I should have mentioned, the printers three foot high
And when sat atop a desk, its height gets amplified
Releasing all its cables in preparation for the move
Watching over shoulder, in case the office disapproves.

 

To wrestle with a printer is not an easy task
It’s at least a two man job, but I’ve no help to ask
Arms wide I grapple till, we’re locked in an embrace
Not one of love but hate and lacking any grace

 

Barely lifted off the desk my arms were getting sore
Not even really sure if I can get it on the floor.
Balance starts to waver, under unexpected weight
But suddenly I’m caught, in what some may consider fate

 

Assisting with my burden, is my amazing office crush
I’m not sure if it’s her, or my pain that has me flushed
She helps me with my nemesis, and then I hear her softly say

“It’s about time you moved that printer, it was getting in our way!”