How Do I Connect?

When I’m not at work, I spend my time alone
Keeping to myself, barely leaving home
Little human contact, a modern day hermit
My world self contained, my life disconnected

 

I’ve forgotten how to engage, with the world outside
Choosing reclusion, you’d be forgiven, if you thought I’d died
Without malice, friends and family have been quietly neglected
How did I let myself becomes so extremely disconnected

 

Nothing that I’ve done so far, really makes a difference
Interacting with the world I’ve succumbed to bitterness
No matter what I’ve tried, it’s never been effective
It’s no wonder that I’m hurt and ended up so disconnected

 

My social life in tatters, but is the fault all mine?
The only time I’m sociable is when I go online
Disappearing from the world, should have been expected
The Internet sedates me, whenever I’m connected

 

Is this all my life can be, digitally detached
I dream of being able, to make a real impact
Still I’m scared, that I could, never be respected
If I take a chance to become reconnected

 

As more birthdays pass, I know I’m missing out
I want to see the world, but my head is wracked with doubts
Self worth and anxiety have left my mind infected
I lack the courage needed, if I want to be fee connected

 

At my age I expected, so much more to my life
A world that I can play in, maybe sharing with a wife
Instead I hide and dwell on pains, the world cruelly inflicted
Is it safer here not risking strife and remain here unconnected

 

The people from my youth have already said goodbye
Neglected for too long, I missed their lives go by
Adventures all without me, feeling quite dejected
I long to find a way in which we could be reconnected

 

Lonely and forgotten, my world in my bedroom
Over-analysing everything, utterly consumed
Needing an escape and for my path to be corrected
Ending these reclusive ways, no more being disconnected

 

Could you recommend, a good way for me to start?
One that won’t break, my already fragile heart
My life to date, has far too may tales of rejection
I want to be accepted in the world and feel connected.

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In response to Daily Prompt Connected