Tails of Rabbitopolous

Chapter Eleven


The Browns were insulted by Mans continued lack of intelligence and angered that humanity actually believed bunnies cared about them after all the terrible pains inflicted upon them.  The Greys were incensed, first they took the sugar, then they tried to eat the rabbits themselves and now the weapons responsible for killing millions of rabbits and are being praised as idols.  Mankind proved once more how moronic they truly were.  Then there was the Whites reaction and what a reaction it was.  Seeing man take pleasure in their deadly creations made the White seethe with fury.  This was an outrage and the Whites began to throw their war machine at mankind.  Overcoming their fears of capture the White rabbits would scatter eggs near the homes of humans, more explosive than those previously used.  This didn’t quite work they way they wanted it to.  In their rage the decorations to the eggs weren’t up to the same standard and were widely ignored by man.

If a human did happen upon one and it exploded the explosive reaction was still too small to do anything more than annoy the human.  They’d just assume the egg had rotted so went about their day, safe in their idyllic ignorance.  Further enraged the White abandoned the humble chicken egg and looked for something bigger.  Tales were told of massive eggs found on foreign continents, so rabbits were dispatched to recover them to use on man.  This went even worse.  These eggs were guarded ferociously by flightless parents.  With a speed to rival rabbit and a clumsy strength to rival man, these giant avian aggressors put up a dramatic defence.  They may have looked ridiculous, especially with heads thrust into sand, but the Whites barely made it back with any eggs, let alone their lives.  On top of all this man saw these larger eggs as too vulnerable, treating them very gently, thus avoiding the explosives inside.  Small eggs were cute and desirable, large ones were too much work.  It would turn out that this was mostly a timing issue, man has an odd relationship with size.  For great period of time it will favour small over large and vice versa.  Sadly for the Whites they acted at a time when bigger certainly wasn’t better.  Anger spread throughout all bunny kind, man had created a fallacy with rabbits at its centre.  They would now take the concept of decorated eggs and steal it for their own, to be part of the magical prophet celebrations of spring.  Still rabbits continued to perish and the hands, feet, machines and inattention of man.  Despite being loved and revered, man caused far too much damage to the simple lives of rabbits  More and more rabbits would be thrust into captivity as their popularity amongst man soared.  Could man not understand there was a war going on, could they not grasp the simple idea that they have their own home and a hutch isn’t the dream for any rabbit?

No peaceful accords had ever been successful in the war.  They were proposed and implementation plans put n place, but one faction would always brake them before they had a chance to begin.  For the first time since the war began the rabbits had something more in common than a desire to return to Rabbitopolous and the selfishness not to share.  Man had finally gone too far and it was time for the leaders of the factions to meet to discuss what can be done about the meddlesome man.  It was an odd moment for the rabbits, to sit across from each other and not be compelled to attack.  The first steps to peace could be negotiated if they could learn to agree.  A season of arguments passed yet shockingly, despite the harsh words and verbal fisticuffs, all three factions remained and were still talking.  They shared tales of man’s inhumanity and traded war stories where man caused the most carnage.  Though their philosophies were different and in one case insane, the rabbits found more and more common ground as they debated mankind.  After much talking the rabbits found a plan that would utilise skills of all three factions.  The Whites would bring their artisan skills for decorative eggs, the Browns would bring their construction skill for bountiful baskets and the Greys would finally get to use their scientific prowess in revenge against an old wound inflicted by man.

Despite the fact that worldwide man still controlled the sugar crops and trade, the Greys knew it far better than man ever could.  With a tentative peace amongst the rabbits they could now use their vast numbers and beloved reputation to their advantage.  In the grand sugar plantations of the west rabbits became pets and mascots, manipulating man to bring them closer and closer to the crop.  At night as the human workers slept rabbits would take what they could and ship it back to allied factions.  It wasn’t a job without danger as they had to battle against pests who wanted the sugar for their own.  Drug addicted vermin just looking for their next fix, the rabbits would have to defend the sugar from these loathsome pests in order to safeguard it for their own intentions.  Inadvertently this made them even more popular with humanity.  They saw the rabbits defending their favourite crop and decided to bring a legion of the long eared pest controllers to guard their interest.  Allowed to run wild the rabbits were now faced with the challenge of hiding their own thievery.  They’d come so far, it would be foolish to be viewed as pests by man and lose their advantage.  Only having to worry about man was a welcome change of pace, now they didn’t have to look over their shoulders for the other factions coming after them.  These small acts of cooperation went a very long way to fortifying this fledgling alliance, fighting with one another against other creatures and helping each other’s quest for vengeance.  The sugar, though integral, was only a small part of the plan.

During the peace talks the White rabbits proudly regaled any that would listen of their plans to use larger explosive eggs.  They did however skip over the part where they came afoul of ridiculous looking birds.  The part that caught the attention of the Greys wasn’t the hunt for new eggs but the new crops that were encountered.  One in particular stood out, a bitter plant with medicinal qualities, potentially addictive and could lead to abuse.  The Greys had a theory, take the new crop and combine it with their sugar, take away the bitterness and allow it to control the desires of man.  The result would be named Chocolate.  Turns out this sweet confectionery would ensnare the females of humanity and as they had the true power, the males would follow to their every whim.  Chocolate would be slowly introduced into man’s world.  The first taste, as they say, is free and once they’re hooked, it the real plot could begin.  The rabbits needed to have mankind fall under its spell before using it to their advantage, but first the recipe needed to be perfected.  Trying to find the perfect blend would take a keen scientific mind and who better than those especially clever Grey rabbits. Despite a reckless nature their ability to take leaps and bounds in the name of science made them quite adept as chocolatiers.  The recently discovered cocoa plant could be broken down into several different components, but its taste was far too much for man to enjoy.  Even with the addition of the rabbit invented sugar the concoction created was far too unstable.  Powdered ingredients that refused to mix and unable to solidify, something was clearly missing.  The bunnies though adding liquid to the concoction would help the mixture form into something solid.  They were of course correct and quickly came to favour milk.  After all it was easily found and the rabbits knew all the best farms from their many adventures stealing from man when wild food sources were low…and sometimes just for fun.  When all the ingredients were melted together with great care and allowed to set in the cool of a burrow, the Grey’s couldn’t be happier that their experiment was a success.  The problem now was the taste test.  The rabbits couldn’t fairly judge their chocolate due to its poisonous potential to rabbits.  The odd part is to this day it is still unknown whether sugar is a poison to rabbits.  No rabbit has been brave enough to taste it after the Greys made such a big deal about its potential when they first created it.  If man had not came along and immediately stolen it, this may have been different.  Generations of bad press in the rabbit community meant sugar was not for bunnies.  Instead rabbits would have to surreptitiously place the chocolate near humans and hope that they eat it.  There really wasn’t a downside here, if it killed them that would be great, if they didn’t like it they’d just try a different blend and if the loved it then the bunnies work was complete.  Luck would be on the side of the rabbits, not only was it love at first taste but the rabbits barely had to try to get man to eat it.  Once again Mans arrogance and lack of common sense meant they found the confectionery, assumed it was edible and seen as no-one else was around it must have been for them.  The rabbits celebrated this victory together and the enemy that tied them together, helped the factions bond grow deeper.  The war left many psychological scars but working together was healing the rift.  With the factions slowly changing their views on war, a mutual trust was forming.  Slow to build, especially between lifelong enemies, the way rabbits lived was changing.  The final attack was coming and despite the risks of courting war with man, they would first take a far greater risk in unification.


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